Helping your loved one with intellectual disabilities deal with disappointment when someone declines a second date is delicate and requires empathy.
First, acknowledge their feelings
Tell them it’s okay to feel sad. That is a normal feeling when dealing with rejection. Dating typically involves meeting many different people and learning about their personalities and preferences. In most cases, finding a match that works for both people will take time.
Reinforce their strengths
Remind them that they are positive and fun to be around. There are many people who will enjoy and appreciate their attitude and personal qualities. Dating is an opportunity to let their personalities shine and have the chance to meet and learn about other people.
Make sure the activity they chose helped, not hindered
What did they do together on their first date? Other factors can come into play that may cause the other person to decline a second date. Was the environment too loud or crowded? Was it a group activity that didn’t allow enough time for one-to-one conversation? If so, maybe meeting for coffee or lunch would be better.
Rebuild their confidence
Suggest they do an activity they enjoy to get them in a better mood. Maybe exercise or a hobby. Then remind them of their positive qualities … “Someone else will appreciate that.” It might also help to talk or write about what they are feeling.
Give it time and try again
Give your loved one time to process their emotions when a second date is declined. Reinforce it is a normal part of dating that everyone experiences. Then, help redirect their attention on meeting new people and trying again.
You got this—and so do they!