Caution Your Love One: Don't Move Too Fast
By
Katherine Gyolai
·
1 minute read
Excitement about dating can lead people to move too fast or come on too strong. When my son with intellectual disabilities started having dating experiences, I could see his excitement growing. I knew I had to coach him on appropriate pacing without tempering his enthusiasm.
Tell them to take their time
Relationships take time to grow. Getting to know someone over time will help avoid
misunderstandings and disappointment. If your loved one starts texting or calling too
frequently (i.e., several times a day), caution them to slow down and give the other person space. You can say, “It’s okay if they don’t get back to you right away. They may be busy.” Remind your loved one that people have jobs and family responsibilities and they will respond when they are able.
How they can express interest
If your loved one is interested in the person they dated and they would like the relationship to continue, encourage them to say things like, “I really had fun tonight” or “I enjoyed learning more about you. Would you like to go out again?” People have a tendency to hold back, but saying they enjoy the other person’s company is a gentle way to express interest.
During the date, maintaining good eye contact, smiling, and responding to what the other person is saying are positive ways to show interest.
As the relationship progresses, they can politely ask, “Can I hold your hand?” Coach your loved one to respect the other person’s boundaries and ask permission for physical contact when they sense the other person is ready.
Romance blooms from friendship
Just like your loved one does not want to be pushed too soon, it’s important for them to
recognize what moving too fast means. Examples are one person inviting themselves into another person’s home, saying I love you too soon, or asking if they can get together again the following day.
Good relationships are built on trust and friendship. Tell your loved one that a great
relationship starts with talking, laughing, and enjoying time together. The romance can grow from there.
You got this—and so do they!